quote:
Originally posted by manderin:
What Kanon said.Also, the ascendant is the thing that people tend to see on first impression so it is often the only reason someone talks to you in the first place. As many astrologers have said.. "When you first someone you see their ascendant. Get to know that person a little better and they'll show you their sun. Get to know them a lot better and they'll show you their moon."
For example: I know someone that according to analysis I have absolutely amazing synastry with. Its so amazing that the astrologer in me would love to just hang around this person more just so I can experience it and see how it plays out.
But no synastry is perfect. Unfortunately one of the tightest aspects we have has to do with my Ascendant. It's his venus square my Ascendant. This aspect generally makes it so that when the Venus person sees the Ascendant person, they feel a dislike or discomfort towards them when they meet. Since the ascendant is the first thing someone see of you, if a person doesn't like your ascendant he/she is unlikely to try to get to know you at all. So none of the other great synastry aspects may get a chance to ever be expressed between you since you don't bother to get to know the person enough. No matter how much I try to be friends with this guy or even just a hello, goodbye acquaintance, they just do not want to be around me even though they don't even know me. It's his loss (and mine) since he doesn't see our synastry would make us at the very least great buddies, but it doesn't happen because he's so turned off by my ascendant he just doesn't bother to get to know me and get to the good synastry part.
THere is another person who has synastry with me that is horrific.... I mean some of the WORST synastry I've ever seen. Yet this person REALLY wants to spend time with me. Why? Because the only good aspects between us have to do with my ascendant. His venus trines my ascendant almost exact and his mars is conjunct my venus. So he literally just saw me one day (what people see is the ascendant) and that was all that it took to get him to want to chat me up and ask me out. Now if I let this go any further between us as we spend more time together it will become clearer and clearer how ill suited we are for one another- even as just friends.
So for better or worse Ascendant aspects are extremely important. They help a relationship start and get off the ground.
I agree with you to an extent, but I think it's much more complex than that.
Bear in mind that someone's ASC is little more than energy - a vibe, a feeling - no two people are exactly alike physically, even with the same ASC. I know this personally because my mother, my sister-in-law, my mother-in-law AND I all have the same Virgo ASC and we are all different physically - shorter, taller, heavier, slimmer, blonde hair, brown hair, etc. etc. and this spreads across difference races and nationalities all around the globe.
So while it seems convenient to peg it on the ASC it may simply be a case of someone not finding the other person attractive, which can be the thing to make-or-break the initial attraction which causes someone to approach or pursue.
As humans we all have our tastes and preferences in a partner, and I happen to find beards a huge turn off, so if I see a man with a big burly beard walking down the street I won't even give him a second glance, meanwhile his ASC may trine my Venus. How would I ever get to find that out?
To make it a bit more personal and to give you another real life example, my current partner and I met online. My Venus trines his ASC, and his Venus squares my ASC. Ironically, I pursued him at first because I found him to be very attractive just from his photos (remember, my Venus trines his ASC). However, when we met in person for the first time on our first date, it was actually the reverse reaction. He came on SO STRONG I was a little taken aback - not quite what I had imagined based on our communications online. After that date the tables were turned and he pursued ME, big time! So even though my ASC squares his Venus, it didn't matter, because he found me attractive enough to agree to go on a date with me, and then definitely attractive enough to pursue me afterwards! We are engaged now
So...long story short...the rules in astrology are never black and white. It is incredibly complex to assess a situation based on one aspect. Besides, I don't think any aspect, negative or positive should be discounted as at least there is SOME connection between the two points. Even the squares generate a fascination, a curiosity, a willingness to dig deeper...an attraction of some kind, whether it plays out positively or not.